3.27.2014

The Trailer Is Here

Production for the latest Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movie (officially renamed TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES, by the way) has officially been under way for some time. And while it's supposed to be a vast improvement over the original script that somehow made its way to the Internet a couple years ago, it has still proven itself to be full of all sorts of fail, like casting Megan Fox as April and the banker with a shotgun in The Dark Knight as Schrad... er, white Shredder.

But, after a little more than a year since the announcement that production is under way, we finally have our first look at the movie. And...

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Wait for it...

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It doesn't look that bad...

From the first look, we can already see it has it's set of problems: subtlety has pretty much gone out the window, cookie-cutter Transformers-style chaos fills almost the entire scene, unnecessary lens flares, unnecessary origin change (anytime I think about combating crime, I know my first thought is purposely exposing reptiles to toxic waste), the fact that Megan Fox is April and so much more.

But the turtles themselves seem pretty intact. Their personalities are there (at least, Mikey's is) and they look pretty damn good. I really like the look of the "raggy" headbands; after all, they are sewer mutants, so it wouldn't be out of the realm of possibility that their headbands would be made of torn-up recycled tshirts.

Of course, ignorant media outlets with no real insight into the franchise have to chime in. The Hollywood Reporter referred to the trailer as "what we'd expect from a regular superhero movie", and went onto say this might actually be a "good turtles movie", insinuating that one has never existed.

First off, we already have a "good turtles movie"; it was made in 1990 and it's still amazing even today. Secondly, the turtles were never "regular" superheroes in the first place, but by trying to portray them as such, most of the magic that made the turtles unique in the first place is taken away. Remember in TMNT '90 when April was about to be attacked by The Foot in the subway? It wasn't the first reveal of the turtles in the movie, but it helped play a big part of their build-up in the trailer. Remember how you felt when you saw Raphael slowly pick up the sai off the ground? It was like, "Oh shit, that's Raf! It's about to go down!" There didn't need to be mass panic and shit flying everywhere to convey the build-up. But now, that's what's there; violent flashes blasting the screen with Megan Fox's stupid face filling the frame as she tries to poorly convey an amazed and curious expression in the loudest way possible. Like I said: subtlety is out the window, and it's a damn shame.

Then again, it is being produced by Michael Bay (and producer is higher than director, in case you wanna argue that point).

Anyway, it was only about a minute and a half, and while we still have to wait (and pray) to see if things get better, that small clip still spoke volumes. While working on the awesome designs, they should have at least tried working on a closer-to-property story.

And if they still turn out to be aliens, so help me God...

What did you guys think? Did it look at all promising, or have you already tapped out and given up hope?

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